Wise Words: Breathe. Trust. Let Go.

The world just seems to be on fast-forward. Like all the time. And I’m not sure about you but, to me, it feels like you should have a plan. There seems to be this need to have one. 

“What are you going to do after graduation?”

“Are you saving enough for retirement?”

“You know, if you just stick it out a little while longer you can apply for that higher position.”

Now don’t misunderstand me. I understand the importance of at least having an idea of how you want things to go. Planning has its time and place. 

What I’m referring to is when planning turns into this rigid scheduling that ends up exhausting you. When what you plan becomes the sole focus and takes over every aspect of life. When your plan is so rigid that it sets you up to feel like a failure.

There are times I feel judged for not have a detailed, step-by-step life plan for the rest of my life. The truth is I was one of those people. Maybe not the down-to-the-last detail kind of planning, but I had this idea of what life is supposed to look like (graduate high school with a diploma, go to school for a degree, find a home, get married, have kids, work, then retire–something like that) and then life throws you a curve ball. You get the rug pulled from under you and all of a sudden your plan just doesn’t make sense or there is no way your plan will work given your new circumstances and yet you keep trying to follow your original plan. 

Am I rambling? It seems like I’m rambling.

Point is, sometimes you just need to breathe. Trust. And let go. Which is why this quote is relatable. For me, I plan the major things (family parties through the year or a doctor’s appoint on my next day off, things like that). Then I keep a general idea of what I want done and just go with it. It’s scary at times and, again, those looks of judgement catches my eye once in a while, but for the most part I can breathe easier. I don’t feel so confined or like I’m a disappointment because Step B did not come directly after Step A.

You don’t always need a plan. Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, let go and see what happens.

Wise Words: The Silent Chapter

Everyone has a chapter they don’t read out loud.  Unknown

Seriously. Everyone. And it doesn’t have to be dark or negative or something ghastly or shocking. Sometimes there are things that are private. Things that you only tell people who have earned your trust. And sometimes not even then.

Silent doesn’t mean bad either. You’re just a bit more selective. You hand your book to that someone and have that someone read it to themselves.

So, hats off to your own thoughts, to your moments, to your silent chapter!

Wise Words: Two Roads

Someone once asked me “why do you always insist on taking the hard road?”

I replied “why do you assume I see two roads?”

~Unknown

Maybe it’s because I’m taking a philosophy course (which I don’t think that’s entirely why) or because I’m always curious or because I’m always open to other perspectives (not that I agree with those perspectives, but I don’t mind listening to them), but this quote appealed to me because why is it that we assume others can see two roads? 

We hear it all the time “why do you always have to do it the hard way?” or “I guess he/she has to learn it the hard way?” And I understand that in some cases, with most people, there usually is an “easy” way. When we don’t listen to those who’ve gone through things before, like our parents. When we read instructions or understand things could be done differently but we chose to do it the hard way, but what if, for that person, there is only one road? Everyone is different. No two people learn exactly the same way so why do we assume there is always an easy road and a hard road? 

Truth is, maybe we shouldn’t assume. Maybe that experience, even though it may be “the hard way” to some, is exactly the way it has to be done for us to learn. Maybe our easy road is a hard road for others. How presumptuous it is to assume there are always two roads.

While I believe that in some things there are two roads, this quotes has me thinking that perhaps it is better of me to assume that this is the exception and not the standard or at the very least that in some cases, in certain experiences, to other people there is only one road. (Hm, how very INTPer of me, *laughs*)

Wise Words: Being Normal

My darling girl, when are you going to realize that being normal is not necessarily a virtue? It rather denotes a lack of courage.

Aunt Frances ~ Practical Magic

 I can’t remember a time where I thought I was normal. I always felt a little bit … off from my classmates and friends. There were times when I felt a little upset that I couldn’t be more carefree like my peers or develop that laid back, chill out type of attitude most of the kids my age seem to exude (because I’m sure there were others out there who felt the same way, they just did a better job at ‘being normal’).

Which is why I appreciate Aunt Frances and her wisdom. I’m not saying I’m courageous, but she made it a point to make me see that being normal may not necessarily be something everyone should strive for either.

And what is normal anyway? Everyone has a unique personality with a blend of interests unique to them. What do others mean by normal? A community culture could behave and act a certain way but drive a few miles in another direction and that community culture would be very different, so wouldn’t that make someone not normal? 

Maybe we’re using the wrong word. Maybe we should be saying things like “I wish I could be more peaceful” or “I wish I could blend in” (but it does sound a bit boring compared to ‘normal’).

All I can say is that normal doesn’t equal good or better. That being not normal does carry an air of courage. We wouldn’t have had the telephone, the computer, or moving pictures of those inventors were normal. 

Wise Words: Moving Forward

Hope, but never expect. Look forward, but never wait.

Hope is a powerful thing. It is sometimes the only motivation for pushing through challenges and hardship. However, it can also be destructive especially when it crosses over to expectation.

Looking forward is a power thing. Like hope, it motivates to get through things. Looking forward opens your mind to possibilities. It gets you excited about the future. Yet, more often than not we play the waiting game because we want to share this excitement with others. However, excitement dims when we wait too long to move forward.

This quote strikes a balance and reminds you of that balance.


Wise Words: Doing different

If you want something you never had …

… you have to something you’ve never done.

Nothing like a good quote to sum things up.
This quote sticks with me for because of the point it makes. Often times, the unknown scares us. I know it sometimes scares me (except my curiosity usually trumps being scared, but not always). Not being in control. Not knowing what comes after. It’s intimidating. But this quote makes a good point. How can you achieve something you’ve never done by doing the same things?

The saying I use the most is attributed to Einstein but I haven’t found anyone in complete agreement with this attribution. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results (and I do want to point out this post by PsychologyToday.com that argues the use of insanity and it’s a really good point). If you don’t do something different, you’ll get the same things.

Doing different isn’t always comfortable (in fact, it almost never is), but if you want things to be different, want things that are different, guess what? You are going to have to do something different.

So, acknowledge your fear of the unknown. You can’t not feel fear. But acknowledge it, embrace it, and then jump!